By Ohdammitnotagain“All right everyone, quiet down now. We all know why we’re here.” The scruffy satyr waved his arms at the assembly before him, gesturing for quiet. Over two dozen small beings were clustered in the clearing, each one possessing the legs of a goat and the torso of a human being. Soon they were all quiet and the head satyr continued. “As I’m sure you all know by now, Sylana has been taken from us to reside in that big tree in the sky.” All the satyrs bowed their heads for a moment, remembering their friend. “Seems she was trying to help a squirrel across the road…”
“Twas a turtle it was,” another satyr interjected. The head satyr frowned at being interrupted.
“Fine then, a turtle. Whatever. The point is she walked out into traffic again, only this time she wasn’t so lucky.” Several of the attendants grumbled under their breath at this statement. “I know it’s frustrating, but she was a nymph folks. They’re kind and loving, but a little slow on the uptake.”
“A few flowers shy of a full garden she was,” a satyr called from the back.
“More like a sex starved bimbo she was,” said another.
“SHE WAS A NYMPH PEOPLE!” The head satyr cried as he threw his arms up in defeat. “What’d you expect, Albert Einstein? They’re supposed to be horny idiots, it’s what they do dammit!” All the satyrs nodded in agreement with their leader. “The point is we need a new nymph, immediately. Without one the whole forest will go to shit.”